Date Night

We've all been there before. You wave goodbye and your heart either skips a beat or you let out a big, heavy sigh because you just survived one of the most horrific nights in the history of DATING. The first date is one of the most defining moments... it's make or break, the beginning or the end, it's yin and yang (what?)... anyway, here are five things that you should try to remember while you step into the battlefield... of love. I think I might be talking to my boyfriend WAY too much. Remember, these rules can be applied as well to all you guys hiding behind your pc, hoping no one would catch you reading my blog..

1. Dress appropriately.  I know you're excited, you're giddy. You don't know what to wear and you've been rummaging through your closet over and over and nothing seems be the right outfit or worse, nothing seems to FIT you anymore. Well, that's what you get for not preparing and not getting your lazy @ss out of the house to buy yourself a decent outfit. What? Did you think I was going to say something enlightening like "It's okay, physical appearance is nothing. He or she will love you for your personality." Yea, sure. The key here is to find a balance with what you're wearing, where you're going and what you'll be doing. You can't be too over the top and you can't be under-dressed either.

Imagine wearing an Oscar de la Renta on your date... to the movies...

Be considerate, and just think that your date would need to buy two seats to fit your ball gown skirt.

Or worse, wearing FLIP FLOPS on your date. How many posts have I mentioned this? Flip flops are only acceptable if you're going to be splish-splashin' around a body of water or if you're at HOME.

2. Eat heartily. I know this is one of the most difficult things to do, especially when your date is looking straight at you across the table. You don't want to lose your poise so you order a salad. *yawn* It's okay to order a salad as an appetizer, not as the main course. 

What most people don't realize is that the more food you have on your table, the more time you can buy for a good conversation. When you enjoy your food, you're bound to enjoy the company too (hopefully). The only main thing when it comes to food selection is to not choose something with too much onion or garlic, unless you're sure that your date is a vampire. Goodbye, Edward Cullen. or with alot of black peppers... those suckers are bound to get stuck in between your teeth and your date will never look at you the same way again.

3. Never self-advertise. Your date already agreed to go out with you, so why are you still trying to convince your date, on your date? It's okay to mention some of your personal achievements but don't bust out showing all your trophies or worse, say how much other people adore you so much.

It would be funny to mention some of your stalker stories but it just makes one roll their eyeballs when you say how much ladies or guys chase you around all the time. Maybe you're telling the truth, maybe people are chasing after you because you still haven't paid the money you owe them, but it's still wise to keep the conversation about general interests and hobbies.

4. Don't have high expectations. This should not be mistaken with lowering your standards. These are two absolutely different things. When you're out on a date, you can't expect too much or you're bound to be disappointed. You might have this perfect The Notebook scenario already playing in your head but more often than not, it's not what's going to happen. He might not say the things you expect him to say or he might not do the things that you expect him to do like pay for the both of you.

It would be nice for a man to offer and pay for everything but it wouldn't hurt to try to go dutch on some things. Like if he pays for dinner, why don't you try to offer to pay for the movie tickets or a drink at your fave cafe/lounge? If he insists to pay for everything, that's fine, but it's better to be prepared if he doesn't. Of course, gold diggers will never agree to this, they will pout and hiss at you if you don't pay for everything.

5. Be yourself but don't get too comfortable. Being yourself can immensely take the tension off you and your date, but don't act like you're hanging out with the girls or going out with the homeboys, at least not just yet. Don't be belching the night away from both exits, ESPECIALLY the lower exit. To simply put it, don't fart your date to death. Don't speak your mind unless you know that you're getting a positive feed back and your date is clearly amused. If you get b-slapped, you know you might have gone a little too far. And as much as possible, you might wanna go easy on the Patron.

The worst thing you could ever do is to look like an alcoholic who can't handle a drink or two. Oh and definitely lay off the beer if you're hoping for a goodnight kiss, no one wants to kiss someone who smells like brewed piss. I know that 70% of my friends who are beer-lovers wouldn't agree but seriously, the smell of beer is just not as enticing as the taste.

Remember, even if your date turns out to be a total psycho from hell, you must admit that it's better than watching re-runs of Sex and the City while eating yourself to death with a bucket of ice cream. On second thought, that actually sounds great...

So, here's a very short recap of the rules that I just mentioned...no flip flops, don't be an  anorexic, don't be a show-off, don't be a gold-digger , don't smell like piss and most of all, have fun for cryin' out loud! You are allowed to smile on dates! Okay? Okay!

Toodles! =)